Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I can read

I have complete contempt for fakery

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

What are the coolest new smart home gadgets to upgrade your living space?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Scientists just learned the age of America's deepest canyon - SFGATE

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Why do men suck dick? Me, I can't get enough

I don’t cotton to rapists

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

What are some questions obviously just asked for sexual gratification?

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Milky Way has 50-50 chance of colliding with neighbor galaxy - NewsNation

I have a reading level above third grade

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

Why do many men like women's breasts?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

Scientists have discovered a hidden city 140,000 years old at the bottom of the ocean. - Farmingdale Observer

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Gun owners, imagine if an attacker comes to your home and takes your gun to use against you before you had the chance to pick it up. Would you regret owning a gun?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I can count

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Knicks fire coach Tom Thibodeau after first Eastern Conference finals berth in 25 years - AP News

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

Why do wives cheat on their loyal husbands?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Which movies have the best endings?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I actually pay taxes

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t buy bullshit

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I see through liars

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”